Latest psychologist visit

Saw him earlier today and discussed the anxiety I've been feeling lately, along with the not sleeping well because of the nightmares. Disturbed sleep is a good indicator of something amiss. 

As far as things go with the credit card debt (am seeing the $ bloke tomorrow) it's pretty much what I've been thinking. The circumstances that lead to the debt were beyond our control and couldn't be helped. Like I've said, David was just too long without money and too long on Newstart. Newstart itself is impossible to live off, and that was all we had between us for a few months after my pension paid the rent. Two people supposed to survive on one Newstart of $490 a fortnight (includes rent assistance I think?) of course left us with no choice but to use the credit card to eat.

Finally now we're in a position where we're actually getting a survivable amount. David was eligible for it but reluctant to take it as he was more thinking about getting back to work, but in effect the Newstart was so low it forced David into going on the Carers Payment, along with the Carers Allowance. Still tight with half the money going in rent, but survivable. That's the good news. The bad news is that the credit card is a train wreck and impossible to service now. Of course I'm going to be nervous and anxious about it all, but it's not our fault.

The court case coming up, the psychologist was surprised to hear about the law changes and new mandatory minimum sentences. I can't for the life of me see any way the court would find psycho Phillip anything but guilty. He even admitted his guilt to the cops after being arrested the dumb fuck ("I thought I'd killed him", "I couldn't stop hitting him", "Can I have an HIV test now?"). If that's not a man that needs to be locked up for society's safety I just don't know what is.

Still, it's not going to be easy having to go to a hearing and relive all the shit again. It's still crystal clear in my head what happened in those few seconds. After giving my statement to the police some time later I had a very vivid dream that night that David had died. I wonder if psycho Phillip will ever truly realise the consequence of what he did in those 15 seconds. 

It's a terrible situation yes, but something has to be done with this nut. Society needs to intervene in his life. Otherwise who's he going to do it to next? And next time he may well kill someone.