Thursday, 3 November 2011

fuck..... Unbelievable......

It's been a rough two days at work. Really fuckin rough. I'm exhausted and not feeling like being there tomorrow. 

In fact not even like being here at all. Having no fear of death is a problem I reckon. 

Why bother with this shit? Why keep going? 

But then there's the thing..... I seem to be unable to cark it...... A cat with 9 lives....... Show me the face of death and I'll fuckin survive.....  

FUCK. Why? 

Today I don't want to. Today I just miss my wife. Today all I want is to go be with her. Today I've had enough and don't want to live. Today I don't care anymore. Today I don't want tomorrow......well not tomorrow here anyway.......

Today I got a call, btw, from a call centre in India about my debt. Some dumb bitch crapping on about what I'd already crapped to her bank here in Oz. She rang at lunch when I was in the cafeteria at work. I could barely understand her. I didn't care about a word she was saying, even if I could actually understand her.

This all sucks really fuckin badly. 

*apologies*, Darlings I've just gotten home from work. I went to the Pub on the way home, and met up with three really good friends down there by chance. One a very recent one, two more long term ones, and the uncle of the more recent one before that too. 

Needless to say we all get on like a fuckin house on fire! For example: .....

New mate, younger than his uncle, is about my age (me49, him 52) and we work in very similar industries as regards out work view. Both in strong unions and stand up to the bosses, even if we're on our own in front of those wankers eh. He's a truckie around Sydney earning good tradesman's money delivering petrol to petrol station's. I am in strong manufacturing union nearly just going on strike over getting a decent pay rise recently.

But we're from different sides of the spectrum. As a truckie he listens to conservative talk show hosts and for some strange reason agrees with them. Like for example that Julie Gillard, the most far right Labor I reckon to lead the so called "Left" party ever, is in fact "almost a Communist"! 

Yet we both laugh about the bosses BS telling the unions the same thing they told each of our companies; like the broke story, or the doomed story, or the end of life in this company story if you get a wage rise. 

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