Went OK at the doctors today for the next blood test. Really put my mind at ease.
Told him about the shit 3 months I'd had, especially about the flu that nearly put me in hospital. Going by the last reading 3 months before the viral load was rather up. If that trend continued then he recommended I start meds sooner than later. The thing being that it should be about managing the disease instead of trying to save you from a crisis; a crisis in fact that need not develop.
My reply to that was that I'd already been saved once and didn't want to have to be saved again! Yeah man, lets avoid a fucking crisis, I don't need another bloody one! :-) Of course there will be mind issues to deal with. I can sort that out with my psychologist. But to know the HIV will be managed and not panicked about is hugely reassuring.
So I plodded off to the blood taking room when called by the blood taking nurse. It's always a laugh in there at the centre. They're right in the thick of it all, seen everything, and gay/lesbian nurses. Asked where was the best, I pointed to a vein on my arm that was the best but few had succeeded at.
She however seemed quite happy about it. I joked that I was just looking at my "1 mil" vein as it hadn't been used for about 4/5 months now (the one I use when injecting). Both of us laughed. She said to keep it for myself. I don't have any problems stopping that sort of thing, have always had the power over it. Unlike beer ......
I go back in 2 weeks for the results. Ready before that but that's when I'm able to get there again. I do so appreciate the non judgment and genuine care at that place. They treat me like a human being who deserves treatment, not someone who doesn't because of lifestyle or sexuality.