Saturday, 19 June 2010

New Production Manager, new disclosure

What a hassle.

As my last Production Manager of the dept has left (after 5 years in the job) I now have a new one. He has proceeded to go through my attendance record over the last year or so, which needless to say on paper looks a total disaster. And although he's been working there for a year or so (part of the other company we've been integrating with) it seems he knows fuck all about my history. So here I am again, having to go through the whole crap of the last 18 months.

I started yesterday. Mentioned that I'd like a quick chat. He came over and said he was going to talk to me anyway to ask WTF was going on. 

It's always a nervous moment. You know what your about to say, but you just never know how they're going to react. I've found the best way is to just come out with it, no beating around the bush (my how unlike me, he he). 

"Um, Peter [previous manager] knew I told him a while ago, and as your the new manager here now I thought it best to tell you too....." A pause as I peruse his expression......  "I'm HIV positive" I said.

His face goes into an expression of almost shock, and I think his heart just skipped a beat. But oh well it's over now, he knows. 

"Well, I knew you had some issues, but I didn't know that!" he replies after catching his breath. 

We go on to discuss the implications in a job like mine, and he wants to have a meeting with the big factory manager, the 3 of us sometime next week. Fuck, now I have to sit there and go through the whole shit of the last year with both of them. Fuck.... I don't mind it's just that to do so can be quite upsetting. I give him permission to tell the other head guy of my status before the meeting.

So I guess it's another disclosure success story. In some ways having such dynamite information can be a real get out of jail card. I mean, there I was in a position of having to explain myself over a disastrous attendance record, and end up him offering to help me in any way possible! And I haven't even begun to explain all the shit from last year that lead me to almost top myself. The HIV was just the icing on the shit cake! I'll have them both just about in tears by the end of the meeting :)
And I don't even need to exaggerate, or "lay it on thick"! Fuck, it's already thick enough.

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