Wednesday 6 June 2012

Bungling Bureaucratic Buffoons (BBB's)

Ok. Why am I not fuckin surprised?
I've been forced into inventing a new name for those who are at present fucking with my head. These bureaucrats in Canberra today, as bizarre and completely out of this world, mental, fucking with your mind shit, are, there are still more such people in this country.

Not only are they in this country doing their deeds, but they also happen to be fucking with my head at the exact same time as the Canberra bureaucrats. This is mad darlings, they are the banks I owe money to too! I won't indicate who they are as they'd love to sue me, well one of them would; that's the asshole bank. 

I've been with them nearly 30 years after arriving in Sydney from New Zealand in 1985. Had a very good record with them after paying back a couple of personal loans ahead of time over the years. OK, now I was in trouble through illness. From the first day I walked in the bank personally to tell them about my situation honestly, they've treated me like a criminal. All along, particularly in the negotiations of the $guru with the bank, they seemed to suspect or assume that I had a big account somewhere else and was just trying to rip them off. I nearly died twice in 2 weeks beginning of last year, and they fuckin tell me that! Fucking assholes man......  

And to top it all off, I got 14 phones calls from India in 11 days, a few of them at work, demanding I pay something. No matter what you told them the next person would have no knowledge of what you told the earlier person the day before. I'd explain it again. After the third time I gave up and rang the bloody $guru. He jumped to the rescue, and demanded the bank to stop these calls immediately. That these calls were in contravention of the legislation as they'd not offered me some Compassionate Grounds thing or some shit, and by law they were required to do so. The $guru threatened to make an official complaint about my case to the Financial Services ombudsman. The bank complied..... The calls stopped. The $guru I signed over authority for him to act on my behalf, and he entered into negotiations with the banks on my behalf.

This bank was completely unco-operative, or words to that effect. On my next visit to the $guru a few weeks later he told me he'd gone ahead and made that official complaint to the ombudsman, and the bank was now co-operating. This guy was brilliant! He really seemed to get off for any excuse to stick it to the banks.

Yeah so anyway, after nearly 30 years with them and a perfect record up till now with them, they handed me over to a fuckin Indian debt collection agency within about a month I think after I went to the bank in person to explain my circumstances now. Assholes! I changed my banking of my pay into, to another bank. The asshole bank charge $20 worth of fees over the next three months and eventually closed it, having to credit all those fees back to do it. That was the end of my 30 year bank account with them.

Then of course we have the other nice bank, but which took 5 weeks to send a single email to DHS, thereby causing this latest event:

So I got a call today on the mobile at work, having to stop work to answer it. It was Jason. The man himself! The actual one processing my Superannuation early release claim. Now, after spending 5 weeks waiting for the "nice" bank to send one email, the asshole banks statements were out of date... Yep, you guess it. They now needed two more up to date asshole bank statements! Again; this was the third time I supplied them. 

Got home from work and got the PDF and a screen shot for both accounts, sent it off, then rung the DHS to tell them to locate the email I'd just sent them and forward it to Jason - as he told me to do. 

 The saga continues.......

So after all that I'd decided to officially christen all of these bank bureaucrats, along with the Canberra bureaucrats, and any other bureaucrats that happen to come along, the Bungling Bureaucratic Buffoons (BBB's) of 2012. Henceforth and hearwith (and any other he) with now upon us exist this new abbreviation. It will be BBB's of 2012 perhaps? But it will be upon us, in the name of whatever, but of us. And we will rejoice and find cereal in the middle of the desert and shit. Then rejoice a bit more.

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