A sad death

David was leaving his work yesterday, and just outside the hospital he came across a man lying on the road, apparently just after falling off his bike. He wasn't breathing. He stopped and started CPR, and fellow staff from the hospital also leaving work, came to help. They even ran out with a defibrillator to get his heart started. The guy came back 3 times and his heart and breathing stopped again 3 times. When the ambulance arrived he was still doing CPR on the guy. The ambulance officers tried adrenalin and whatever else. Unfortunately the guy didn't survive. Seems he had a pre-existing heart condition.

David was very upset about it last night. The guy looked about 50-55 he reckoned, with a wedding ring on. Looked very fit, not the sort of bloke you'd expect to die of a heart attack. But he reminded David of his father who died early last year, and all he could think about last night was the police going around to his family and telling them he was dead. Someone who'd simply gone out riding a bike for a bit, and dies. It seemed so unfair that he should go with no family or friends around him, lying on the road. The death was so meaningless.

People were ringing and texting David from his work last night asking if he was OK. Must say I'd not considered before the trauma that health workers can go through when trying to save a life. I was saying to him that he'd done all he could, exactly as he should, but sometimes when your number's up, it's up. Not to feel guilty about it as that was destructive sort of guilt.

He has his own views on life and death of course. My position though was that there's no rhyme or reason to it, but simply the chance of the universe. One person my die out of the blue, their life taken almost at the drop of a hat. Another person, like me who was dead for all money, appears to be some sort of mutant cat with nine lives. There's no good or bad to be applied anywhere, no moral imperative attached to it. I'm no better than the guy who dropped dead on the bike, yet I live and he dies. Why? There's no why. The same as there's no reason for a dice rolling to a six or a one. Life and death is a game of chance.

We talked about that last night. I related how after surviving near death, since then I've felt like I'm on borrowed time or something. Would ask myself why did I survive? But there was no why. I simply had some good luck so to speak. Even meeting David at the pub was a chance meeting. Now I sometimes wonder about how such a good person and I could meet who are so in love with each other. We finally lucked out.

David was saying he's going to appreciate to the most every day.