Alone in my world

Not too concerned, just a bit annoyed. Simon has been saying to me a few times now questioning why I need to take anti-depressants and that I should get off them along with all the other pills I've stopped taking. That things are going well now and there's no reason for me to be on them. Even suggesting that I'm only taking them because I like to take pills. 

I've sort of said that depression just doesn't work like that. It doesn't just suddenly stop when circumstances improve. It can have a life of it's own. The pills anyway aren't some far out drug, all they do is put chemicals back in your head that get depleted through stress and life over time. They have made a real difference for me. Yes they are a crutch, but one that I need for now. After what I've just been through I really can't believe he's talking like that. It's incredibly insensitive.

I don't want to make too much of it though, as long as he doesn't dig in over it. It's quite understandable that what I'm dealing with is beyond the understanding of many. I don't expect people to really know. Unless you've been there yourself you can't really know. The most I'd want is for them to simply recognise that they can't imagine how I'm feeling and what I've gone through. I do feel a bit lonely at times where I am. 

I thought of this. 

The shit day does end, the sun does set on it. Sometimes it's easier just to say goodbye and walk away from it all, nothing left to salvage, start again tomorrow on a new day.