Saturday, 22 October 2016

A difficult few days...

I know David's talked to me about it before, but the sight of crime scene photos on the telly of his first boyfriend Wayne Tonks, after being murdered, was deeply disturbing.

I've been feeling very anxious since watching the Show (Deep Water) which I guess is understandable. So anxious however it's been almost like a mental paralysis. Haven't been able to concentrate on anything, and it feels like being surrounded by a big wall. Hard to be interested in anything.

Had trouble even with normal things. I didn't do the dishes for 2 days, and a couple of days didn't even eat anything. 

I can't imagine how David must be feeling. He said after the program that he nearly had to leave the room when the bit came on about Wayne. It's been decades since the murder but obviously it's affected David enormously. 

It really is hard to put into words how one feels in the wake of such a hate crime as the murder was. You feel vulnerable and aware that there are people who hate us simply because of who we are, and that some of those people are willing to act on that hatred.

BTW, the murderer only got seven and a half years jail for it.