Friday, 11 December 2015

Pretty much had it with my daughter

She got married in October without even inviting me, her own father. I don't even know her last name now. 

She won't tell me her address where her and her husband are living, blaming David as being some sort evil asshole (when she left she screamed out she wished he was dead). 

She either has me blocked all the time on her phone and email or doesn't even have the decency to reply. To send her birthday card last month I had to scan it, email it to her uncle, who forwarded it to her.

I'll be discussing it all this week with my psychologist, but the last straw was an email I got off her the other day. I had (months ago now) emailed her telling her a few very direct home truths about her behaviour over the last ten years culminating then in not even inviting me to her wedding.

She finally got around to replying to that, with an email showing she just hadn't the faintest idea. Over the last years since 2009 I've been discussing the situation between her and I with the psychologist and getting guidance through it all, but she reckons that I should admit that I made mistakes and should act like a father. WTF?

That it was only when she was 16 that she made mistakes, saying nothing about putting me through ten years of shit.

That she was thinking of the future and I was living in the past.

And on and on. Stuff that's just not true. The psychologist has told me through it all that there's been nothing that I could have done differently. I'm not taking the blame for her behaviour, and I'm not going to wear any guilt over it. If she expects me to come grovelling back to her in a guilt ridden apology then she's got it really wrong.

Her email I could write a five page reply to it pulling the thing to bits piece by piece. But I honestly can't be bothered anymore. She's not going to listen to a word I have to say in her self righteousness and just get more angry at me. It'd be a complete waste of effort on my part even writing a reply.

She's 25 now anyway, married into a large extended family. A well paid stable job. I feel proud of myself that I bought up someone with such a difficult personality and she's ended up succeeding. I gave her the opportunity and guidance to do that. Certainly a big accomplishment on my part, given that there was so much difficulty with her and adversity. I've done my bit as a parent, and done it well. There's nothing I could have done differently.

Now after all this I just feel like leaving her hanging. Not replying to her email at all. Staying right out of contact with her. Everyone has their limit, and it looks like I've come to it with her. 

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